Letting people down is not something I relish doing. I hate "breaking the news", and I generally put it off as long as possible. Though I doubt that letting the wait drag out hardly improves the situation, I guess it's more for my sake. Knowing that people may think less of me or blame me for something is the worst. I shouldn't care what they think, but I do. It's natural for me to want to please. It used to be worse. Back in high school when I had frequent and disturbing nightmares, I narrowed the problem down to my difficulty with saying no to people. I would let myself get so stressed out with not only my schedule, but worrying about what other people would think if I messed up, that my mind would vent when I went to sleep.
All this to say that I have news that will not make some people happy at all, and I don't know how they will react. These people have been so good to me, and while I can get pretty frustrated with them, they have done a lot for me since I have known them. I've always been a teacher's pet--so sue me-- and this situation doesn't seem any different.
So boo. I have to break the news soon, because once the paperwork starts trickling back in... Ben and I are moving to Korea.