19 September 2011

Don't let me down.

Letting people down is not something I relish doing.  I hate "breaking the news", and I generally put it off as long as possible.  Though I doubt that letting the wait drag out hardly improves the situation, I guess it's more for my sake.  Knowing that people may think less of me or blame me for something is the worst.  I shouldn't care what they think, but I do.  It's natural for me to want to please.  It used to be worse.  Back in high school when I had frequent and disturbing nightmares, I narrowed the problem down to my difficulty with saying no to people.  I would let myself get so stressed out with not only my schedule, but worrying about what other people would think if I messed up, that my mind would vent when I went to sleep.

All this to say that I have news that will not make some people happy at all, and I don't know how they will react.  These people have been so good to me, and while I can get pretty frustrated with them, they have done a lot for me since I have known them.  I've always been a teacher's pet--so sue me-- and this situation doesn't seem any different.

So boo.  I have to break the news soon, because once the paperwork starts trickling back in... Ben and I are moving to Korea.


Melco said...

Let me tell you, that was written PERFECTLY. You had the perfect amount of tension, and just when I thought you weren't going to give up the goods... BAM. Last sentence! Wow! Congrats on moving to Korea. Are you guys going to go teach? I've been considering doing that myself, but I've been pushing it out of my mind because I'd be all alone out there.

Rebekah said...

Thank you! We are indeed going to teach... we decided it will be the most financially lucrative move for us at this point, especially since both of us still want to go back to school. Plus we both love an adventure...

You should totally go! Now you know you won't be alone. The paperwork sucks, though.