27 April 2009

take me to the riot.

You know what's funny (and probably not a very good thing)?
The more I get behind on school work, the less I care about it.
And the more I think about the future.

19 April 2009

more adventurous.

At this point in the semester, the name of the game is "Keeping Your Head Above Water."  I'm behind on schoolwork, and it's tough to stay motivated to get it done in the first place.  I'm coasting through my classes, and I'm having a hard time putting much effort into my extracurriculars.  I guess you could say I'm a little distracted.

Summer plans, the boy, thesis plans, friends in pain, planning my future in general... It's all culminating into one big, crazy ball of distraction.  I don't know if I'm depressed or anxious or just stressed.  I feel like I could sleep for an eternity.  Little things frustrate me more than they did.  I want to get away.

I've been having weird dreams lately.  Maybe not nightmares... just forays into things disturbing.

I need to clean my room.  I need to write my paper(s).  I need to practice for my lesson and get ready for tonight's meetings/rehearsals.

...but I just want to go to bed.

I was going to drive down to Maumelle to turn in my Starbucks application this morning.  I'd had it all filled out and everything.  Typical, though, my car was dead when I went down.

That would be my life, lol.

Seriously.  One of these days I'm going to have a reliable car.
...it may be a while, though.

Love, Beks

p.s. the roommates think I need to see a "doctor".  And when I say doctor, I mean a girly doctor.  lol. I won't fill you in on the gnarly, personal details, so I'll just say that I've got this paranoid feeling that I'm going to find out that I can't have kids.  (I wanted to put a "lol" after that, and then I disapproved of my own levity in light of the subject matter.  ...lol).

02 April 2009

A good day.

How exciting today has been!  After Stage Makeup, I stayed behind to talk to my professor and ask her to be my thesis tutor.  She was totally pumped about it!  Eeeeeeeks I'm so excited.  She's got some great ideas about different techniques we can use, and she really wants to help me get into the SFX type of makeup that I'm still not that great at.

Happiness.  :)

Also, I got an invite to stay with Fanni's fam for a few days while I'm in Hungary -- very welcome!

Oh, and I met with my little over coffee, too.

So aside from the icky stormy weather we've had, it's been a good day.

Ben's coming to visit me tonight, so I don't really know how the day could get better.

Ah, life.  ♥.