God, I hate myself sometimes. A lot of the time. I hate myself for my unhappiness, that no matter where I am or what situation I'm in or who I'm with, there's a pain that clutches at my chest and tells me I'm trapped, I'm not in control, I'm unhappy, I'm wide open. I hate that I'm a book so easily read. I hate that I can't let down my guards and that I'm too much of a coward to do anything about my unhappiness.
I disgust myself. Don't pay any attention to me.